Hello again!! Today let’s talk about better goal setting strategies. In my opinion, goal setting is the first big step towards getting to where you want to be. AND it is the most exciting part! Besides getting to that goal of course.
If you’re like me, you may have struggled with creating these big, outrageous goals with all these intense steps, that inevitably end up making you feel more overwhelmed than accomplished, and usually end in us feeling like “failures” or “lazy” for not making it there. The language we use and the intentions we set for ourselves when creating goals is extremely important, and something I’d love to talk about with you here! The most efficient way I’ve found to do this is by changing and morphing goals we already have or have had, into better ones. Let’s do it!
A LOT of these ideas have come from The Change Makers Academy; I highly recommend checking out their articles! They have been extremely helpful in allowing me to become a better coach, and a healthier individual (inside and out) as well.
First, let’s talk about how to change an “outcome” goal into a “behavior” goal. An example of an outcome goal would be something like wanting to lose 20 pounds on the scale. The issue with outcome goals is that they have many uncontrollable factors (for this specific example some uncontrollable factors would be holding onto extra water, being close to our period, building muscle mass, etc.) that can actively sabotage our progress.
A behavior goal on the other hand, is an action that we have FULL control over, and that will inevitably lead us to that outcome goal, in a more sustainable and (usually) enjoyable and rewarding way. A great way to turn the outcome goal of losing 20 pounds into a behavior goal would be to put into practice putting our fork down between bites so we can be mindful of where our hunger levels are at; which is an action we have full control over, and can prioritize for a few weeks to master. After mastering that action, we could move onto/add on exercising consistently, which is another action we have complete control over. These actions then will likely lead to the weight loss we want (which is usually fat we’re trying to lose) without us getting caught up in all the factors we can’t control when it comes to the scale weight.
Next, let’s talk about how to morph “avoid” goals into “approach” goals. An avoid goal is one where we attempt to completely eliminate something from our lives, like telling ourselves “no soda”. The problem with this is that we’re human, and when you tell someone to not do something (even if it’s ourselves), they don’t listen and do that thing anyway. It’s actually more likely that they’ll do that thing. This involves a level of perfectionism as well, so when we end up “breaking” that avoid goal that we set for ourselves we feel like failures, and all those negative feelings can lead to us giving up altogether.
Instead, we can turn those into “approach” goals, which involve going towards something more positive and more inspiring. For example, we can change the “no soda” avoid goal into a “I will drink a glass of water with every meal” approach goal. This means we focus more on drinking water (which is good for us and makes us feel good) and less on telling ourselves not to drink soda. This leads to us being more hydrated with water, and also makes us less likely to want more soda. This is helpful too because we take the importance off of soda; it’s no longer seen as a magical beverage up on a pedestal (like the apple from Adam and Eve’s story).
Finally, let’s dive into changing “performance” goals into “mastery” goals. A performance goal includes having some kind of external validation, and involves (again) factors that we have no control over. An example of this would be trying to set a record time for running a race. Although having a goal time to reach is a great beginning to setting up a solid goal, there are a lot of things we can’t control, like the weather, if we get sick on race day, injuries, unknown obstacles, etc.
A “mastery” goal is one where we focus more on the intrinsic validation of learning something really well, and understanding something as deeply as possible. This focuses more on the value of learning and gaining knowledge, and is fully in our control. An example of how to change the race time goal into a mastery goal would be to break down some controllable actions we can focus on that would increase our speed or efficiency; like making sure specific parts of our technique or breathing are mastered. Focusing on these pieces of our race will most likely help us set a new record, without the possibility of us feeling like “failures” if an unknown and uncontrollable factor comes up.
Using specific language and a bit of psychology helps us set achievable, measurable, enjoyable, and positive goals for ourselves. A big piece in this is to only focus on the actions and behaviors we can control, and then breaking those down into pieces that we can measure and be held accountable with moving forward.
I hope this is helpful to you! I have been reading up on these tactics a lot lately, and have already noticed some unhelpful language that I’ve been able to change in order to feel excited and clear on my path to achieve what I want to achieve.
I wish you the BEST of luck in getting to YOUR specific goals!! And I hope this post gives you some tips, tricks, and ideas on how to make this process as enjoyable and efficient as possible!
Until next time!